Personal feelings must be laid aside when you make a decision to serve God in whatever ministry He puts you. After all, He knew all the rules and regulations of that ministry before He put you there.
These words by Mr. Nance hit me hard. Here I am, drowning in my own sorrows and depression, missing the one woman I've ever truly loved, and God is working everything out right in front of me. Mary Beth gave up so much to follow God's commandment for this season in her life. I know her pretty well, and God spoke to me a lot. Her sorrow is still there, she just knows how to hold it in better than me. I know she still loves me, and I her. The rules of Elevate suggested that full-time interns shouldn't date, so they could focus on God 100%. God knew these rules before Elevate was ever created, and He's making sure she follows these.
I honor Mary Beth, second to God, for doing this. I will wait patiently, until the day God releases her from this commitment. I can't keep getting depressed and 'whooh is me' every time I see her looking at me. It's going to be a hard 6 months, but I've decided to stop letting the enemy take my joy and gifts from God. I need to focus everything I have on God, and when God is ready He will unite us again, if it's His will. Which I pray every day that these feelings and promises I feel from God are not false.
I want to finish up by praying for my family. I haven't spoke with my mom in a while, and the last time I did she had finally been filled with the Spirit of God and received the gift of tongues. I pray she's still walking in faith, and has found an accountability partner to mentor her. I pray for my pastor, Dino, and his family, to keep fighting the good fight, and keep receiving the Word to guide us through times of trial. I pray for the full-time Elevators. With all of their finances, food, and commitments. I pray for China, and all the lost, sick, and poor throughout the world, that they may come to know Jesus, and take this world by storm. I pray for my emotions, because i've been a wreck these past few months. I pray for my purity, that I keep my eyes on God, and nothing else. God help me become more faithful, that I may call on the name of my Lord whenever I'm walking through trials or on the mountain. Lastly, I pray for peace. I need peace, and your hand to guide me through these next 6 months. I love you God, with all my heart, mind, and spirit. I long for the day I get to be in your presence, sit at your feet, drink from your cup, and weep with joy!
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